When we left my dad I was hurt. I couldn't the fact he wasn't part of my life anymore but I still didn't care. I acted like life was worthless. I never came to think that someday I would get over. That I would come realize that we did it because we had not because we wanted too. My mom never got the fact that I was daddy's little girl. I would do stupid stuff because I would believe it was the right thing to do. I was just around 11 or 12 years old when we left. We tried to start a new life but we couldn't because I was the problem I didn't know how to handle my emotions at that certain point. I would think of running away and never coming back I would consider killing myself if I didn't see him one more time I really thought I missed but I was all wrong what I missed was the fact that he was 5there but he wasn't when I wanted a hug he wouldn't care he would just leave me and go scream at my mom that I wanted attention. That's when I realized I didn't miss him I just miss the feeling that I always dreamt on having. I really thought I missed him but I was wrong I missed having the feeling of hope he would care some day but that was just a waste. I choose two songs both songs always make me cry. One of them is Daddy' Lil' girl by Frankie J and the other is Hurt by Christina Aguilera I choose both songs because that's how I felt during that period of time I didn't just feel sad and depressed but I actually felt hurt and that I was never going to be Daddy's little girl.
Hurt
"Seems like it was yesterday when I saw your face
You told me how proud you were but I walked away
If only I knew what I know today
I would hold you in my arms
I would take the pain away
Thank you for all you've done
Forgive all your mistakes
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To hear your voice again
Sometimes I want to call you but I know you won't be there
I'm sorry for blaming you for everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you
Some days I feel broke inside but I won't admit
Sometimes I just want to hide 'cause it's you I miss
You know it's so hard to say goodbye when it comes to this"
Daddy' Lil' Girl
"He drops his suitcase by the door
She knows her daddy won't be back anymore
She drags her feet across the floor
Tryna hold back time to keep him holding on
And she says
Daddy Daddy don't leave
I'll do anything to keep you
Right here with me
Can't you see how much I need you
Daddy Daddy don't leave
Mommy's saying things she don't mean
She don't know what she's talking about
Somebody hear me out
Father listen
Tell him that he's got a home and he don't have to go
Father save him
I would do anything in return
I'll clean my room
Try hard in school
I'll be good
I promise you
Father, Father
I pray to you"
I when i wrote this I never thought was actually going to finish it. I though I would just write then erase all my work like I usually do. I can't believe I actually am going through with this. Most people wont understand this Personal Narrative but i hope at least they can try.
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